birthday lottery ticket

On my birthday I bought ten lottery tickets. The jackpot was $100 million. If ever I would win a lottery jackpot I figured it would be on my birthday, my special day. On my special day, I would be treated by the universe, by God, as special, I would win the lottery, I would win the $100 million jackpot. I will be set for life. I will give millions of dollars to my friends and family. I will be rich. No, I would be wealthy! I will be healthy, wealthy, and wise. I will have more fun than a human being should have. I will be soooo happy!

Gleefully, I purchased my lottery tickets. I bought ten tickets, ten quick picks, for ten dollars. I only needed one of the ten tickets to have all the winning numbers in order to win the huge jackpot. I had ten chances to win $100 million on my birthday. If ever I would win a huge lottery jackpot it would be on my birthday!

After the lottery drawing, I excitedly checked my numbers. I won! I was a winner! Did I win the jackpot? Did I win $100 million? No, I won $1. I won a lousy dollar. I spent ten dollars and won one dollar. In other words, on my birthday, my special day, I played the lottery--and lost nine dollars.

God hates me.